Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Day 2...

In the LDS ARP meeting I attended last night, we read and shared on the first step. There is a line from a talk given by Boyd K Packer, that I have heard many times, but last night I pondered it more deeply, “The study of the doctrines of the gospel will improve behaviour quicker that a study of behaviour will improve behaviour. Preoccupation with unworthy behaviour can lead to unworthy behaviour. That is why we stress so forcefully the study of the doctrines of the gospel.”

So I have been thinking about that line…. “Preoccupation with unworthy behaviour can lead to unworthy behaviour.” What do I do with this idea? I know that every action is first a thought. My addiction foods (about anything really) first enter my consciousness. It can be triggered by many different things, but once the thought enters my mind, I really struggle to get it to leave. Yesterday I decided to keep a stick of gum in my pocket. I planned to use it to divert the thought. It is still there in my pocket. Yesterday was easier than I anticipated.

We had lunch at Chili’s. Bonnie and I shared a plate of Fajitas. It was good, but I didn’t feel ‘full’. The ‘thought’ of the molten chocolate cake entered my mind. My answer to the thought…. “You can have that, if you want to spend your points that way.” My points are like a tight budget. I have them and I can spend them however I wish. Just knowing that and giving myself the freedom to choose helped me with the passing thought….I didn’t need to ‘preoccupy’ myself with it. Later I indulged in a 3 point ice cream cone from McDonalds. It was a point expenditure I was willing to makeJ

Here is a scripture:

Alma 38:12
boldness, but not overbearance; and also see that ye bridle all your passions, that ye may be filled with love…

The sweet and terrible gift of agency….I am constantly given the opportunity to use it. Using ‘boldness and not overbearance’ is much gentler and pleasant than the “grit your teeth and comply” type of cure that I often try to enforce upon myself.

Yesterday I used about 22 points. Plus I exercised for 30 min.

No comments: